I got this card from my dad. It made me cry right when I saw it. I didn't even have to read a word. It's amazing how well he knows me.
Yeah, it was good to cry. I liked doing it. It is also good to work. Mr. Posatko has hooked me up at Weller/Grossman. It has been a great job. I love the people I work with, and the energy is really nice there. Thank you, John for helping me be a part of it.
For those of you wondering what I'm doing I'll say this, "Imagine me with headphones, a TV, and a computer." That's the job. A prize for who can guess it correctly.
Besides that, I've been busy doing various interviews, learning L.A., painting, and learning the bass guitar. Pretty good for my second week here. I have also been reading all your blogs. They are all so good.
Here, are some personal notes, some shout out's if you will.
Corn Man - You are the best poet! Pudgy - I am praying for you. Werdenfield - Love you. Sparky - Where's your drawing? Are you on freeze frame? Vevlvety - How was the camping trip? La La Lopez - Loved the quote on Werden Harper - You are beautiful. Hot and cold together. Eileen - I dig romance. Posatko - You got 10? Fawcett - Great talk on Harvard. Mishty - Masterful Wizard Talker Henriksen - Glad the heat ain't bringing you down. Loudon - Beautiful paintings.
Thanks for inspiring me this week. I look forward to the next.
Here is Marlowe right before we crossed. He sported that shirt the whole trip. It does make him look rather dashing, don't you think?
"We got about a minute," Mar says.
"Nah," I tell him. "More like 20."
The cur crunches over the dirty asphalt. I can smell burning, and for a second, have images of flat tires and an over-turned car.
"You better hurry," Mar chuckles.
I reach in back for my new digital camera. It's a polaroid. Just one big squre of a camera. That's why I got it. The square. And the Polaroid thing. It made me feel like a picture would come shooting out, even if it was digital.
"Smile," I tell Mar.
"I am smiling," he says.
"Yeah, but make it look good," I say.
"What do you want me to do?"
"I don't know. Put your arms in the air."
Marlowe raises his arms. He giggles in his half nervous way, like any second an alien might appear and take him to the second quadrant of a Douglas Adams book.
"That's good," I say. "Hold that."
His arms come down to his hips. It was too much to raise them in triumph. There was a sadness. It was like a piece of him was back through the tunnel. Like he had made a mistake by crossing.
He talked to me about it later. After we were back in the car and rolling to Moab. We both did, really.
For me, it was a buzzing in the ear. Like someone talking to me. Like Boulder saying, "Bye, come back for a visit."
I assumed this was Nicole.
"Okay," I said in my head. "We'll see."
I don't know what Mar said in his head. e just looked at me after I told him this, and said, "Yeah, I felt a change in the tunnel too."
I wondered what was in his head for 5 seconds. Actually, that's not true. I didn't wonder. I could feel it. A sound like a heartbeat, except it was wheezing a bit, like some shadowy Baryishnikov was tip-toeing across his soul's retina.
"What are you talking about?" my mind asked.
"I don't know," I replied.
"What?" Mar hallooed. "You say something?"
I bring myself back to me. I put my hand under my thigh. This helps on long drives for some reason. It makes me comfortable.
"Look at that," Mar gestures.
"Yeah," I watch the mountains rescind and then rise again - majestic and fragile. "It's nice."
"Fucking unbelievable," Mar shakes his head.
"Yeah," I nod.
Baryishnikov does another number. This one a two-step-samba. My head bobs with his hips. He's a good little dancer. He can burn holes in hearts when people least expect them.
I chased the Sun to Boulder. This shot was at 73 mph through the passenger window.
Seeing this made me fall in love with everything all over again.
I kept wanting to stop and hang out with the Jersey's packed together. I wanted to be there in the middle of a group of horses. I wanted to be in a field next to a bale of hay.
I am spending today saying goodbye to Boulder.
I like being alone. I like being in control of my life. That's what I feel right now. Sitting in this apartment with a laptop on the floor. This technological wonder of recently acquired wireless. Man, it's awesome.
Almost as good as the night sky on my birthday. Almost as great as me eating a hamburger. Almost is just almost enough to help me make it through the night. Almost is an interesting word. I don't like it anymore though. I don't want almost. I want done. I want completed. Those words are better.
Last blog until I get to Cali. Leaving on July 10, 2005 at 10 AM.
1st Stop: Midway to Boulder (Iowa?) 10 hours
2nd Stop: Boulder, CO 7/12; 10 hours (pick-up Marlowe for adventure through lower continent)
3rd Stop: Somewhere midway; 10 hours
4th Stop: Los Angeles
If people need to get in touch with me, call my cell phone. I think the trip will take 4 days. I will take pictures, and tell you about it soon.
PS. T and D I sent your paintings already. They will be there before I get to Cali. T I will see you in Colorado. Maybe, if Marlo and I are making good time we'll stop in Frisco. I've never been there. It might be fun.