Viral Leak: Possibly H7N9!!

This is real! I repeat REAL!! I know all you haters think we made this shit up, but there are real mutations happening near Palmdale. We were driving up to shoot some stuff for another company when we heard about this sewage leak up near 14 North right before Lancaster.

From what we've found on the Internet, this is real. You can look here and here. Both have journal reports about how Avian Influenza A may have started the condition.

Some are saying that it is associated with the virus in the frost those scientists found. Personally, I think it has to do with fracking. The Earth has a way of fighting back, ya know?

We're going to head up there again to get more footage. I'll post videos here.

OSCARS: Predictions 2014

The Oscars are part of a long and financially costly campaign for Hollywood. Each studio rallyies behind the films in their roster with the biggest star power/chance to win. This can often change over the year as box office sales and critical reviews shift the popular vote.

To put the race in the proper perspective, let's look at the financial earnings and studio pedigree of this year's nominees before we begin:
  1. "Gravity," Warner Bros., $256,314,185, 10 nominations, released Oct. 3, 2013.
  2.  “Captain Phillips," Sony, $105,010,295, six nominations, released Oct. 10, 2013.
  3. “American Hustle," Sony, $103,565,129, 10 nominations, released Dec. 12, 2013.
  4. "The Wolf of Wall Street," Paramount, $80,741,968, five nominations, released Dec. 25, 2013.
  5. "12 Years a Slave," Fox Searchlight, $39,002,295, nine nominations, released Oct. 17, 2013.
  6. "Philomena," Weinstein Co., $22,324,543, four nominations, released Nov. 22, 2013.
  7. "Dallas Buyers Club," Focus, $16,769,169, six nominations, released Nov. 1, 2013.
  8. "Her," Warner Bros., $9,900,985, five nominations, released Dec. 18, 2013.
  9. "Nebraska," Paramount, $8,477,367, six nominations, released. Nov. 15, 2013.
  Obviously, Warner Brothers and Sony need to make a choice between their two contenders. Based on the latest polls, HER is not going to be a breadwinner over GRAVITY, so don't expect it to win anything other than a screenwriting award. It may also be clear to some that AMERICAN HUSTLE has been Sony's major push over CAPTAIN PHILLIPS, so bear this in mind as you compile your predictions.
So, without further ado, here are my Oscar predictions based on financial earnings, popularity, and intuition:


My family watched a screener of GRAVITY this past Christmas, while I read articles on the Internet in the other room. I could tell from about ten minutes of hearing the film that it wasn't for me, but that it would be appealing to audiences for its tight-wire act and CGI wonder. The music was constantly crescendoing and then there would be worried muffles from Bullock's character that went the whole 90 minutes--eh, gad!

It also had a huge campaign with two huge stars and the perfect director to get you there.

Still not convinced? What made the most money this year? 

12 YEARS A SLAVE I actually saw in theaters. It was a good piece that was beautifully shot and well acted. It deserves to win, but it'll take second seat to the technological wonder that is the Oscars. But, who knows? The recent racial divides on Macklemore and Kendrick Lamar at the Grammy's do point a finger at the continued issues around race in America. Academy members might react to this and choose 12 YEARS, but I doubt it. The beckoning of "space" and "CGI" will be too much for audiences. Remember, films seem better when they have technological spectacle, and DO THE RIGHT THING lost to DRIVING MISS DAISY, so why would a real racial depiction of slavery do well? It's highly unlikely.

For people that actually suffered through AMERICAN HUSTLE -- one of the most mediocre films ever made, but with an incredible marketing campaign and slew of star power to help zombies overlook it -- you may find the film winning an Oscar. It is possible. If it does, then this would be the worst outcome of this year's Oscars. That's why it just might.

No one probably saw any of the other films nominated, but let's be honest, none of the others have the campaigns these three do to take home the gold. Let's also say it again: which film made the most money?


BEST DIRECTOR: Alfonso Cuaron or Steve McQueen?

Las Vegas odds:

Alfonso Cuaron ("Gravity") 1/2
Steve McQueen ("12 Years a Slave") 2/1

This is the same scenario as the Best Picture category. It'll most likely go to Cuaron for his technical prowess, but it really deserves to go to Steve McQueen or Martin Scorsese, who had the best films of this year. There could be an upset, but I doubt it.

BEST DIRECTOR: Alfonso Cuaron

I really have nothing to say about the rest of these acting awards, so let's just give it to the people who had the best campaigns, political correctness, and whose roles make Academy voters feel more at ease with the status quo.

I have also listed Las Vegas odds (in italics below), which believe that Chiwetel and Nyong'o will win, so be ready for some upsets here and potentially for Best Picture. We'll know how things are going if Nyong'o wins early in the night.

BEST ACTOR: Matthew McConaughey

Chiwetel Ejiofor ("12 Years a Slave") 6/5
Matthew McConaughey ("Dallas Buyers Club") 7/5

BEST ACTRESS: Cate Blanchet
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Lupita Nyong'o or Jennifer Lawrence

Jennifer Lawrence ("American Hustle") 4/5
Lupita Nyong'o ("12 Years a Slave") even
I predict that the next categories are for the folks that should have won in all other categories and make Academy members feel better about their previous choices being so vanilla and predictable.


I doubt many Academy members have even seen any of the films in the foreign category. There's too much to do. They just watch trailers and choose based on what they hear is the right choice. THE GREAT BEAUTY won the Golden Globe, so it'll get the most votes, but there will be others who are curious about THE HUNT, since it has the guy from the James Bond films. Why not, right? It really is a crap shoot. Let's go with THE GREAT BEAUTY to be super boring because that's what the Oscars are.



 I've actually seen most of the documentaries this year. They were probably the best films of this year -- much better than AMERICAN SPAM. But the Academy will choose the film with the most heat behind it, which has been THE ACT OF KILLING.

The actual best documentary of this year was CUTIE AND THE BOXER.


The animated feature category should go to the best film, which will always be a Miyazaki film, but the fact that the film deals with a WWII bomber has made it an unpopular vote, so the Oscar will most likely go to another Disney film  -- FROZEN. Why? Because that's what all your kids will watch because it has good songs and is what they're supposed to watch.

Um, GRAVITY, because it's about space and seems pretty is a good enough reason for it to win in all choices, but it'll probably be a little bit of the film's well-publicized technological efforts of how it took more than four years to figure out how to accomplish the digital magic tricks that make it a favorite for all statues in the technical categories.



Usually production design and costume awards go to the period piece, futuristic film, or most lavish budget.

What is the period piece this year? Probably split the award with AMERICAN SPAM. Why? The wigs, right?


The best score goes to the most memorable film, which is usually the one that had the greatest emotional impact, so it'll most likely be GRAVITY or 12 YEARS, right?


Song always goes to Disney, doesn't it?


Can you believe that Jackass will win an award? Maybe. I don't think so though. It would seem out of place.


So there you have it folks. This year's Oscars. The upsets that'll get people talking at the awards parties will be Dicaprio winning over McConoughey and one of two of the other awards going to an unexpected or deserved winner, such as HER or CUTIE AND THE BOXER.

Brad Warner's Hardcore Zen - Ojai Screening

Thanks to everyone who came to our US premiere! It was a huge success!! We had about 150 people braving the cold and meeting a guy in a bunny suit. :)

I've put some more pics of the event below. These are all courtesy of Adam Eurich, who was kind of enough to take pictures.

It was nice to do a Q&A with a guy in a bunny suit. My favorite moment was when we tried to give gifts to audience members by having Brad point at an iPhone with everyone's names and his bunny hands just covered the entire screen.

"Wait! I can use my pinky finger!"

"Okay," I said. "It's the only way."

My other favorite moment was getting a free shirt from Pretty Glam Special myself! Rachael, who curates these vintage wearable art pieces, handed me one and said, "Yours!" I jumped for joy and then did a Superman pose. Naturally, right? What else could I do?

On Wednesday, we're off to our screenings in Seattle and Portland. If anyone cares to hang with us, we'll probably be busking at the theaters before showtime -- our latest idea to make flight and gas money. Who knows? Maybe we can make $10 by singing about zombies.

If you have yet to donate or pass on our little fundraiser, please be aware that we've now added DVDs to the list, which will include the downloadable links with extra scenes as well. We also have some pics of our dino paintings, which come in full, black and white, with stands, or framed. Ooo-la-la.

Please share or get one of the gifts. It really does help us get everywhere, since we're doing this completely independently, which basically means: by the skin of our teeth.

Thanks again for the support in Ojai. It was great to see everyone. We're looking forward to more of the same in Seattle and Portland. Oh, yes, and Brad is giving away free hugs. :)


Tickets for US premiere of BRAD WARNER'S HARDCORE ZEN in Ojai, CA, Seattle, WA, and Portland, OR are now available for purchase

Tickets for US premiere of BRAD WARNER'S HARDCORE ZEN in Ojai, CA, Seattle, WA, and Portland, OR are now available for purchase.

Ojai Playhouse | December 06, 2013 @ 9:30pm $10

Northwest Film Forum | December 12, 2013 @ 8:00pm $10

Clinton Street Theater | December 13, 2013 @ 7:00pm $10

BRAD WARNER’S HARDCORE ZEN is a documentary about a controversial Zen master who has sought to strip away the sheen off many taboo topics in Zen Buddhism and exhibit a healthy dose of reality to his readers.

Director's Website:

Q&A and prize giveaways at each screening!
  • Ojai, CA - Playhouse Theater - 9:30 p.m. - December 6, 2013
  • Seattle, WA - Northwest Film Forum - 8:00 p.m. - December 12, 2013
  • Portland, OR - Clinton Street Theater - 7:00 p.m. - December 13, 2013
  • Akron, OH - TBA - March 12, 2014
  • Brooklyn, NY - TBA - March 15, 2014
  • Los Angeles, CA - TBA - April 12, 2014
  • San Francisco, CA - TBA - April 19, 2014
  • Las Vegas, NV - TBA - April 26, 2014
To purchase tickets please visit or click active links above.

If you would like BRAD WARNER'S HARDCORE ZEN to be screened in a theater not currently on our list, or would like Brad to chat with your group while he is on tour, please e-mail with specifics.

Each screening will include prize giveaways, special guests, and a Q&A with zen teacher and actor Brad Warner and director Pirooz Kalayeh.

Video highlights from last year's screening for SHOPLIFTING FROM AMERICAN APPAREL

Brad Warner's Hardcore Zen World Premiere

Dear BWHZ Family,

It's official!!!!! BRAD WARNER'S HARDCORE ZEN is finished!!!!!!

We will have our world premiere at the Buddhist Film Festival Europe on October 5, 2013 at 6:00 p.m. at the EYE Museum in Amsterdam.

The film will also have a limited screening throughout the USA and Canada from November 6, 2013 to April 26, 2014 through Local Screen.

Some cities on the list already are: Seattle, Portland, Montreal, Akron, Philadelphia, New York City, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Las Vegas.

Other cities will be added as the tour becomes solidified.

If you are interested in the film coming to your city, please contact us at

We will mail downloads and incentives for our summer fundraiser once the tour is complete on April 26, 2014.

An additional fundraiser to support touring of the film will occur this November. We will have new incentives, along with special gifts exclusively for any of our summer funders who decide to support again.

Updates to the new fundraiser and the theater tour will be posted at our Indiegogo page, here, and via e-mail.

Please contact us if your address has changed, or if you have any further questions regarding the theater tour or shipping of incentives. Hopefully, we will see you on the tour.

Thank you again for your support and generosity. This film and its tour would not be possible without you.


Pirooz Kalayeh
Producer / Director


Steve Albini Interview about In Utero Sessions

I listened to this great interview with Steve Albini about his work on Nirvana's IN UTERO. Albini discusses the initial letter he sent to the band, the shared band interests, and the basic environment of the recording.

Albini is very aware of how people are manipulated in interviews, and he is quick to frame everything in a black and white reality.

I would like to meet this producer this year.

Runner's Knee

Apparently, I got runner's knee. It's called "when you get old" or some shit. I couldn't do anything for three days. I had to lie in pain most of the weekend. Then I iced it and cried a lot. I didn't do this out loud, because that wouldn't be manly. I did it quietly to myself when no one was looking. Anyway, it really hurt.

Today was the first day I felt like I could do some exercise. I played the 19 year old in tennis again. He's really good. He beat me again today. I just got too tired. My arms didn't work anymore. I think I'll have to start doing some pushups to build upper body strength. Then I'll just need to run about 8 miles a week. Maybe more.

They say that runner's knee can be resolved by having better shoes or investing in special soles for your shitty shoes. I think I'll do the latter. Then maybe I can run and play tennis without crying. It's no fun to cry.

Also, I realized I have no friends other than the people I play tennis or make movies with. I don't know if this is the result of being ambition driven and living in a city or simply a byproduct of growing older and not being around anyone I grew up with or had experiences with. I suppose that's life though.

People make friends early in life and keep them because they stay in one place, or they get new friends by doing a lot of social activities or having kids and whatnot. Since I don't have any kids, and I'm not big on social activities besides playing tennis, making movies, or watching them, it leaves very little room for a huge panoply of friendships to suddenly emerge.

It's my own damn fault. I've got to take some baking classes or something. Either that, or realize I don't need friends. Or just hold my knee and cry.

I think my knee is starting to hurt a little. I better go ice it down.