Are We Controllers of Our Own Destiny?

The Secret talks about the possibility of manifestation. It came at just the right time for me. I would suggest it to anyone who is looking to make their dreams a reality.

I am grateful for palm trees, the Moon, secrets, breasts, nipples, Burt Kristbaum, noodles, McDonald's, my parents, my family, my friends, art, Basquiat, Keith Haring, Tomatoes, Whole Milk, Pudgy Pigeon, Dentyne Ice, Brandon Jackson, the woods, trampolines, Kate Mitchell, Vikram Bhagat, Neel Dhingra, Maghan Stat, John Forester, Swigsets, football, pencil cracking, Tommy Welling, Basketball, sewers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Drama Club, Governor's School, cotillions, Violent Femmes, Soul Coughing, Sublime, Jane's Addiction, The Doors, Nirvana, The Beatles, John Lennon, Cat Stevens, U2, Foo Fighters, Nicole Norton, the number 19, soccr, Mr. Strobel, Mrs. McVaugh, Mr. Zippe, East End Cafe, Richie, Kevin, Sonny, Mark, Cecil's Water, drugs, heroin, cocaine, acid, mushrooms, crack, fliers, self-promotion, palm trees (again), University of Delaware, Michael Cotsell, Mr. Rewa, Ann Waldman, Bobbie, Bhanu, Steven, Teresa, Sean, Marlowe, Nikki, Dave, Maura, Shane, Santie, Dylan, Boxing, Habibe, Jesse, Garages, Ping Pong, Snow, Mountains, Buddy, walking, Whole Foods, Movies, Target, cigarettes, ashes, dust, Christmas, Buddha, Shamans, Tim, Dariusz, Sonny, envelopes, agents, Gary, books, writing, S.E. Hinton, J. D. Salinger, Nabakov, Kafka, heart, painting, water colors, gas fireplaces, Ramaya, Susan, teenagers, body odor, plays, musicals, soccer, The Shins, shinguards, competition, Los Angeles, homelessness, Trevor, Mars, Golden Ashtray, the New Moon, coyotes, skunks, cats, bears, fish, salmon, eggs, muli-grain oat bread, Apple Cinnamon Cheerios, cinnamon anything, waffles especially, Hollywood Boulevard, Mickey, Fitzy, BOB, DTH, WG, Lindsay, Kelsey, Brian, Screen Door, producers, television, money, unemployment, libraries, Gabriel, running, Thanksgiving, Valentine's Day, Birthdays, cupcakes, felatio, cunnilingus, sexual intercourse, fliring, eyebrows, arms, legs, toes, fingers, eyes, felings, coughs, sniffles, sickness, Big League Chew, softball game, tennis, Andre, Nike, Master Tsang Tsao, Sufis, Byron Katie, Milk, cookies, Cookie Monster, Big Bird, Sesame Street, Bill Cosby, Michael J. Fox, Back to the Future, Luke Skywalker, Iran, Havah, ob gusht, spoons, forks, knives, plates, kitchen, room, bed, sleep...

Please place answers before me so that I may see them with the utmost clarity.

1. I will sell The Whopper Strategies.
2. I am writing Mars or Bust.
3. I will finish writing this novel and sell it by Christmas.
3. I am grateful.
4. I am beautiful.

6. I am open, honest, and real.
8. I am in love with myself.
9. I will write THINGS I SAY TO THE MOON by June.
10. I will form a band to play out by April.

11. I will apply for grants to create income.
12. I tutor children and teach writing to create money.
13. I am a professor.
14. I read my work all over the world.
15. I love and honor my family and friends.
16. I love and honor myself.
17. I let go of old stories.
18. I enlightened.
19. I healthy.
20. I cool.
21. I ready.


Downtown said...

Sad I didnt make the list. I am quite grateful or my family as well. Mickey visited this past weekend. So you got enlightenment? brrrrr. you scare me on halloween.

ichat- frankybaby1

your address

Pirooz M. Kalayeh said...

i am glad you didn't make the list, so i get to tell you now.

i am grateful for you.

enlightenment doesn't come or go. it's there all the time. it's not like your arms or legs. they can get cut off. then you don't have them anymore. enlightenment is different, though. it doesn't really have any "it" to it. it's more like sugar. you put it in your coffee, but you can't see it. it looks just like coffee. sometimes you drink it and you're like, "Mmmm, sugar." sometimes you don't notice it. you just drink your coffee. sometimes there isn't even any coffee or sugar. you're just in the middle of West Chester at a coffee shop drinking green tea, wondering whether you want enlightenment or a record deal. that's when things get fun.

you might realize chasing things that don't get any closer isn't much fun.

you decide drinking tea might be better.

you drink the tea.

it's warm.

you get your spoon.

yo stir your sugar.

you drink your tea.

if your tea could talk it might say:

enlightenment isn't a metaphysical conundrum. it's not intellectual. it doesn't care what you look like. it just is.

it's your tea, drink it. it's your room, clean it. it's your life, live it.

if the sugar talks, it might say:

enlightenment is when you believe the same thing about yourself, another person, and its opposite at the same time.

how can you chase enlightenment and not chase it at at the same time? how can you get a record deal and not get a record deal at the same time? how can you have love and not have love at the same time?

what if you have everything you want already? what if you are what you want?

if you are enlightnement, how can you chase it? if you are a record deal, then how can you get it? if you are love, then how can you change that?

i can say:

when i was a boy, my father put a poster in my room. there was this fawn running through the woods. above the photo it said: "if you love something, let it go. if it loves you, it will come back."

what if it never left? what if there was nothing to let go?

this is enlightenment.



ps. burtkristbaum