Pirooz Kalayeh Dies to a Fanfare of Trumpets and Tweety Birds

I am so sick. It's not even funny. I think I might have pneumonia. I'm not sure. I will wait until tomorrow to see if it is hospital bad. Very strange to be sick. Very strange for it to rain all day in Los Angeles.

In brighter news, my brother, Paiman, got engaged! Great news. I wish him and Jenny the very best. I have not talked to him to find out when the wedding is, but I will get pictures and all.

Now I battle the sickness. I am downing a bottle of NyQuil. I am also digging these Tylenol Colds. I am putting everything into my system. Just trying to flush this bugger out.

Why is this happening? Why am I sick? It's obvious isn't it? A part of me is dying away. And an even bigger truth, I am already dead.

Yes, I am the Do Do.

I wonder if this is how artists go. No health insurance. A seedy apartment. Books everywhere. Papers on the floor. A mild cold that blooms into something all powerful. A sadness to not be able to create. And thus, the sickness gets worse.

I am thinking happy thoughts now. Mary Poppins. Whiskers on Kittens. Anne of Avonlea. Whopper Strategies. Burt Kristbaum. Old friends. Yarn. Ants in my bathroom. Cockroaches on Hollywood Boulevard. The gentle thump of a pigeon.

God spare me from the desire for love, approval, and appreciation. God let me die quickly. Let me come back strong. Let me Obewon. Searching the city for sci-fi wasabi.

PIROOZ READS THE WHOPPER STRATEGIES

Here is me reading the beginning of THE WHOPPER STRATEGIES. I recorded it for Perry and them boys at Ellipses. I did it in this real weird voice. Then I was like, "Okay" and sent it. I am big into doing things on the fly and improv and what not, so I guess this will do. It is very strange to me though.

Of course, not as strange as being sick. Why am I sick? Someone read my palm. Somebody else check my pulse. For Godsakes is there a doctor in the house. Someone kiss me. I'm dying.

8 comments:

JWG said...

Dont die man, you are only a kid, many years ahead of you. Kristbaum would be lost without you. Give a roach a kiss for me.

jim

Michelangelo said...

yeah homie, i'm listening to crazy over the "F" beat my boy sent me. It's mixed rather well together they are about the same length. You wished that you were dead in it though, so maybe you got what you wanted. You can't allways get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need.

Pirooz M. Kalayeh said...

J--No worries. I am killing this sickness. I think it was to provide me with time to send off some queries to agents.

M--Mmmm. Send it to me.

Mary Rachel said...

Stacy Elaine got me hooked on Dayquil....
but I'm also a fan of the Hot Toddie.......some hot water with a little honey and lemon, topped off with some bourbon. mmmm....sleep.

So then if you die the starving artist way....at least you got a buzz.

Sure I'll bump into you one of these days. The last time you were wearing a trucker hat.

Pirooz M. Kalayeh said...

MR--Didn't know you were in LA?

Mary Rachel said...

ah...no. on the other side of the world in sweet Chicago....and it is sweet. But I have to go visit Miss Dacheux soon....which means I'll bump into you....and other lovely birds. Get better!

John Posatko said...

Hang in there, tiger. Africa told me about this vitamin water that gets you through tough times. Get the kind that has zinc in it. It's at Ralph's methinks.

I love you, man. We all love you. Stay healthy and alive. We need the "mmmm, (click click click)" in our lives.

JP

Stacy Elaine said...

oh no bud. if i were in LA, I would bring you some soup and emergence-C! Get well soon little bug. I'm thinking of you.

stace